[Book Review] The Berenstain Bears Get the Twitchies by Stan and Jan Berenstain

Well, I’m thoroughly baffled. There wasn’t a word of this that made any sense. Apparently, the Bear parents have mistaken hyperactivity–possibly indicative of a treatable medical condition–for whatever the hell “twitchies” are… And it seems these dreaded “twitchies” are the bane of society and must be stopped at all cost! Luckily, Papa pretends to have the “twitchies” himself, so Brother comes up with a brilliant solution: if he stops twitching, that’ll cure Papa!

Wait, what? None of that makes any sense! What does it matter if the kid squirms in his chair? There are absolutely no possible negative effects of being antsy for a single afternoon–and if its a persistent problem, the kid needs to go to the doctor, not be pressured into trying to will away a medical condition–but apparently it’s a big fucking deal in the Bear household. And why would Brother think that sitting still would make his father stop twitching uncontrollably? And–?

No. Nope. I’m done here. It’s too stupid, it’s completely nonsensical, and I’m moving on. One star.


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